Happy Valentine's Day!

Hope your day is filled with love. I'm away from my little loves today (work day, boo!), but I've heard Theo had a fun morning at school for their party and Lucy helped her mom grocery shop. Like last year, we will have an at home date once I make it home this evening. Happy day!

Church.

DSC_0035, a photo by MelissaandSusan on Flickr.

The kids and I have been attending church (and by "attending" I mean, we've been twice and our record is 45 minutes). I've taken Theo to a UU church several times, but it's kind of far and while there is a lot I like about it, it wasn't the best fit. I grew up in the Catholic church and while I have MANY issues with the church and theology in general, I do enjoy the cultural and traditional aspects of Mass. I searched around and found a parish that could be the twin sister to the church I grew up in. I emailed with the family life director and found that they have a very supportive LGBT ministry and even participate in pride events. The email I received back was long, thoughtful and heartfelt. I felt like it would be ok to try it out.

This morning was our second go 'round. I don't feel good about leaving the kids in the nursery (Lucy wouldn't stay anyway) and I overestimated Theo's ability to sit still. So, the first time didn't last long at all. This time I got smart and brought the Leap Pad and earbuds. Worked like a charm. Lucy is really good and just watches and sings and talks quietly. We go to the 9:30 Mass which seems to be the one everyone brings their kids to. They both did great this morning.

This morning's homily (like a sermon to the non Catholics in the group) was all about including and honoring everyone, even those that are different. He somehow related this to the story of lepers in the bible, but I was distracted. Anyway, I was left with a feeling that we were wanted and included, just the way we are. Not something religion typically does a good job of. They also had a baby baptized this morning, which was so sweet to watch.

So, I think we will continue to try it out. It's in walking distance from the neighborhood we hope to move to next year. I want the sense of a church community for the kids as well as the grounding feeling tradition brings. So far, so good. I hope they don't disappoint me.

And to be honest, I enjoy having a reason to dress the kids up. This picture is baby girl this morning. That jumper is to die for and she hadn't worn it yet!

On ending nursing.

When Theo stopped nursing, it was so hard. I wrote about it. I will do that for Lucy, but just haven't yet. I feel guilty about that, but I think it's largely because I was REALLY ready. I was committed to letting her lead the way just like I did with Theo and I did that. And three weeks ago, I finally accepted that she was over it. She was down to nursing just at night and she wouldn't latch, she'd just reach for her crib. Sister always knows what she wants and after her bath and PJs, she wanted to snuggle in her crib. Fair enough.

So, we made it 14.5 months and like big brother, she never had a drop of formula. She's the last baby I will ever nurse. It was bittersweet for sure. Though, after sharing my body with another human for nearly 4 years, I was more than ready to have it back. It's nice to have the freedom to grab dinner with a friend after work now and again and let Susan handle bedtime. It's nice to not worry if the only thing I've had to drink all day was a cup of coffee and a diet Coke. It's nice to take any old medicine I want for whatever ailment I have. I'm happy to just worry about myself for awhile (well, physically I mean).

That said, I will always miss nursing. It's sacred and special - growing another person. For both of my kids, I know I gave them something that no one else in the world could. I am very proud of that, especially considering how difficult the early weeks were. And soon I will write Lucy that letter for her book, so she will always know that no matter how hard it was, we made it through and we are both better for it.