Sleep Lady, night 1.

We are "sleep training" baby T. Except that I hate that, it sounds too close to the "crate training" we did with our dogs. So, in my head, I call it "sleep learning." Theo is not a sleeper. Never has been. As we tend to err on the side of attachment parenting, simply placing our child in his crib and closing the door, leaving him to cry alone in the dark until he just gives up was nothing something we were willing to do. Ever. I'd rather be awake every night for the rest of my life than do that. So, we went searching for a gentler method when it became clear that he was not going to become a good sleeper by some miracle of the sleep goddess. We started with The No Cry Sleep Solution. A book that makes a very nice coaster and is good for little else. A little more research and I found something I thought we could work with. Enter The Sleep Lady. She's an LCSW, which I think made it immediately more palatable - you know, like minded folks and all. 

The premise is that you make sure your child is on a predictable eating/napping schedule during the day (already done), establish a good bedtime routine (already done), break the nurse to sleep habit (yeah, not even close) and then stay with your child as they go to sleep, moving yourself farther from the crib every 3 nights. We actually tried to start a few weeks ago. We did one night and it was TORTURE. I sat right by the crib singing, shushing and reassuring while Theo cried and looked sad, confused and scared. I hated it. I hated every minute of it. But. It was only 20 minutes, I was with him the whole time and like every other milestone, he had to be the one to do it. I can't do it for him. Then he got sick with his very first cold. I didn't feel comfortable changing up his routine while he was ill, so it got put on the back burner. Then it was his birthday and we had guests and his routine was upset a bit so we didn't restart. 

Last night we decided it was time to start in earnest. We gave him his bath only instead of nursing him to sleep, I kept the light on (but dim) in his room and read books while he nursed so he wouldn't fall asleep. I put him in his crib drowsy but awake and steeled myself for the worst. And then the most amazing thing happened - he DIDN'T cry. He bounced around in his crib for awhile and then he just laid down and went to sleep. It was amazing. I was shocked. I was relieved. And then, I cried. I love having him in our bed and if he would just sleep there, we'd let him stay. But, he needs to sleep and so do we. I will just really, really miss him snuggled up next to me. 

He ended up waking up 7 times. Susan handled all those in the Sleep Lady method - she sat close to the crib and sang, reassured and shushed until he fell back to sleep. This went on until 3:30am when it seemed as though he was genuinely hungry so he came into bed and nursed and slept the rest of the night between us. Where I like him. 

I'd say it was a rousing success, even though he had several wakings. He went down by himself without a tear and didn't get nursed until 3:30. I think our first goal will be no night wakings until the 3am-ish hour and if he comes in bed then, I'll be happy. 

We'll see how tonight goes. It's off to a good start. It was a repeat of last night wherein he went down without a fuss. He's woken up once, sat up in his crib and then put himself back down. We didn't even have to go in. 

Thank you, Sleep Lady.