Lucy's birth story.

(I am going to have Susan write one from her perspective, as things happened so fast at the end, I don't have as much memory of what happened as with Theo).

Lucy's due date was 10/27/10; however, given that I had gone early with Theo, it was out of the realm of possibility in my mind that I would make it to my due date. I was getting anxious and was so tired of being pregnant, that on Monday the 18th I decided to start doing some things to help Lucy out. I was supposed to have a stretch and sweep at my appointment that day, but the midwife said I was too thick and couldn't do it. I was 2 centimeters dilated and 40% effaced. I left that appointment and went to have dinner with my friends at PF Chang's where I ordered the meal that kicked off labor for Theo - only 1,000 times spicier. My whole face ran and I could barely eat it, but I wanted to do anything possible to have a baby. Well, that didn't work. Tuesday the 19th we went to the state fair. We walked for three hours and I had some delicious, greasy fair food. We came home and did a few last minute things, certain I would go into labor that night. Well, I woke up on Wednesday the 20th disappointed to not be in labor and hauled myself into work. I had some bloody show that morning which clued me in that something was happening soon. I didn't feel well that day at work. I felt kind of nauseous with mild cramping and just "off." I was also losing more of my mucus plug throughout the day. I let my team lead know I wasn't feeling well and probably would go home early. I stayed until 2:00 and then went home to rest. I laid down the rest of the day, still just feeling unwell and really tired.

On Thursday, the 21st, I woke up to go to work and still felt crummy. I also had a feeling things were imminent, but wasn't having any contractions. I decided it wouldn't kill anyone if I started maternity leave one day early (since I only work two days a week and was SURE I wouldn't be at work on my due date because she'd be here). My body just seemed to be telling me to rest. I called and left a message for my team lead and laid back down while Susan took care of Theo. At 7:30am, I felt my first contraction that felt like more than a Braxton Hicks. It wasn't wrapping around from the back, but felt much lower and stronger than what I was used to. I laid there for a bit and felt a few more. I decided to start timing them, but didn't say anything to Susan as I didn't want to sound the alarm when it could very well have been nothing. They varied from 4-6 minutes apart, lasting from 45 to 60 seconds. I sat on the yoga ball and bounced around and tried to distract myself, but they remained consistent. I emailed my mom and sister (who were coming in for the birth and Theo care) and put them on "yellow alert", still not believing it was real or that she would actually be here anytime soon. I finally told Susan what was going on and that I wanted to take Theo to the park to walk on the trail. She got really nervous and really felt like I should call my mom and sister and tell them to get on the road. I didn't want the calvary to arrive for no reason, so I insisted we walk and if things were still happening when we got back, I'd call.

We headed to the park and I brought my iPhone to time contractions while we walked. They remained around 5 minutes apart, even while walking. They were uncomfortable, but I kept thinking it didn't hurt enough yet, so it was still very early labor. We got home and Susan just wasn't going to calm down until I called my family. Mom and Sam were both eager to come and said they could leave right away. I told my mom to bring some work with her, as I was sure we were nowhere near delivery. I came upstairs and bounced on the ball some more and then decided to take a shower as I didn't want to go to the hospital all grungy. In the shower, the contractions got a lot harder. No closer together, but I had to work harder to get through them. I got dressed, put on makeup and dried my hair and then Mom and Sam arrived. I told Susan I wanted to take a walk once she got Theo down for a nap, so we did that around 12:30 or so. I felt like I was managing the contractions well and felt like I was in a "zone" and wasn't talking much to anyone. I had not yet called the midwives because I was so gun shy about going in too early, after my labor experience with Theo. I finally decided to call around 2:00 and let them know what was going on. The contractions had changed to 4 minutes apart and I had to put the phone down when I was talking to the midwife to work through them. She asked me a bunch of questions and told me to get my things together and head to the hospital.

We took our time getting things together and going over last minute instructions for Mom and Theo. Theo woke from his nap in a grumpy mood and Susan brought him up to see me. She left us alone for a bit and he cuddled up to me in bed and seemed so sad. I talked to him and told him I loved him and that Gramma was going to take good care of him. I will never forget those last few minutes of just he and I. I brought him downstairs and we got ready to leave. He and Mom left for Target at the same time we left for the hospital, thinking it would be a good distraction. I was so incredibly sad to say goodbye to him. I was worried about how he would do with my mom as he was shy and upset when she got there. And, I was aware that I was changing his life forever and sad that I couldn't explain it in a way he would understand.

By the time we got to the hospital and into triage, it was 5:00pm. The midwife, Stephanie, checked me and said I was 4 centimeters. I was so discouraged. All I could think was that after managing contractions since 7:30 that morning, I'd only gained two centimeters. I started thinking back to Theo's birth and how basically the same thing happened. I then started to cry. I told her I just needed this whole thing to be over. The pregnancy had been so incredibly hard, saying goodbye to Theo was excruciating and I just wanted an end. She said we could do pitocin and an epidural if that's what I wanted, as contractions had stopped at that point. She said "I just don't do tears." WTH? A midwife who can't deal with crying? Anyway, I agreed to that. I just wanted to move along and however that was possible was ok with me. I asked if I had to get an epidural then or if I could try to manage contractions on my own with the pitocin. She said I could certainly try and the triage nurse said she'd had an unmedicated pitocin delivery. So, I decided we would start there and see how I did. Stephanie left to admit me and Susan and I were left in triage. The triage nurse was really sweet and encouraged me to let go of my first labor and accept that this was a new one and would be different. She talked about the mind being very important in labor and did her best to cheer me up and get me thinking positive.

We got into a room and Sam and Susan got the cars situated and set out to find something to eat. I hadn't eaten much and they told me I couldn't eat once the pitocin was started. They ran down and got me a ham sandwich and the nurse gave me a few minutes to eat it before she got started. Once I was done, she put the IV in my hand, got me on the fetal monitors and started the pitocin. It was around 6:00pm when she started the pitocin drip. She told me she was going to start out at a low dose since I'd just had a baby less than 2 years ago. Susan and I decided to start walking around the unit to help things along. Contractions restarted, but weren't really any worse than what they had been at home. I was able to work through them easily. Sam stayed in the room and watched Project Runway. As we lapped around the unit, my nurse would adjust the pitocin amount in 15 minute intervals. The second dose kept the contractions pretty much the same and we kept walking. She turned it up again and I was tired of walking, so we went back to the room. I asked when the point of no return was for an epidural and she said there wasn't, unless baby was crowning. She explained that shift change was at 7, so if I started thinking that way to let her know so she could get it ordered. Around 6:30, the contractions all of a sudden got really strong. I asked for a yoga ball and worked through about 2 of them before I decided I really was done with dealing. Sam or Susan got her and I told her I was done and wanted an epi. She agreed and said she would go get it ordered. The contractions were coming like gangbusters and I was having Susan do counter pressure while I sat on the ball, but nothing was making a difference. The next thing I knew, I got "stuck" in a contraction that wouldn't quit. I started screaming. I screamed at Sam to get the nurse and tell her to turn the pitocin off until the epidural was in. My body felt like it was being ripped in half. I couldn't move off the yoga ball and felt myself losing control. I started screaming "help me! help me! get an epidural!", which I am sure scared the crap out of every other laboring woman on the floor. I have never felt so much pain my life and there was no break at all in the contractions, it was just one long one. At 7:00 the nurse and midwife rushed in after hearing all my screaming and I begged for some kind of pain killer in my IV until the epidural came. Stephanie sternly said she had to check me, which made me mad. All I wanted was pain relief! Then my water broke all over the birth ball. She and Susan took my pants off and helped me onto the bed, where I screamed and writhed in pain. Stephanie checked me and made eye contact with the nurse. She looked at me and said "sister, you are at 9, the epidural won't make it."

Susan was telling me it was about to be all over and Stephanie was barking at the nurses to get a tray ready. My poor nurse who was supposed to leave at 7 stayed to help the new nurse who had just walked in. I kept screaming and was no more believing this was about to be over, as 30 minutes ago, I had been fine and only an hour before had been a measly 4 centimeters. Stephanie told me to open my eyes and listen to her. She said my body was going to tell me to push and to go ahead and do it. I started to feeling burning and knew that meant her head was ready. Susan kept saying "she's right there, you are doing so good!" and all the while I was wanting to just DIE it hurt so much. I started pushing and felt the ring of fire. I pushed when I felt like it, but really, Lucy came down on her own. I vaguely remember hearing Stephanie tell me to slow down and said Lucy had the cord around her neck. I gave one more push and she was out! 7:15pm - two hours and 15 minutes from when I got to the hospital, an hour and 15 minutes after given the first dose of pitocin and 45 minutes from when the contractions got really strong and felt like labor.

I was so shocked at how I felt instantly better once she was out. Everything just stopped and they put her right on my chest. She seemed so tiny to me and was screaming loudly! The room was bustling as I don't think anyone expected it to go as fast as it did. Lucy hung out on my chest while we waited on the cord to stop pulsing. Once it did, Susan cut it and we got a good look at Lucy. Stephanie said I had one small tear, a 1st degree that would need two stitches. She said the placenta was ready, but she wanted me to push it out as the marginal cord insertion made it risky to pull on it. I pushed it out and once again, declined to look at it (gross!). I tried to get Lucy to latch, but I was laying down and couldn't quite make it work. I laid there with her on my chest while they stitched me up. Finally they sat me up and Lucy latched on right away! I gave her a few minutes and then handed her off to Susan.

I remember right after she came out locking eyes with my nurse and saying "I did it!" I honestly couldn't believe I had lived through it. We stayed in that room only long enough for me to get up and go to the bathroom and then they took us up to our recovery room. Stephanie congratulated all of us and said I was very strong. I have no idea what Sam was doing during the birth but she took great pictures afterwards!

We settled into our recovery room and they brought me something to eat. My legs were shaky, but otherwise, I felt good. I do regret that I don't have many specific memories of Lucy coming out or the actual moment of birth. I was so out of my mind with pain, I was focused on ending it and wasn't thinking much about what I was doing. This saddens me since this was the last time I will experience it. There wasn't time or sense of mind to ask for a mirror to watch her crown like I did with Theo and there are definite gaps in my memory of what happened. Susan's version will hopefully fill those in.

We are so lucky to have two healthy, beautiful kids and have spent the last few days settling in. Lucy loves to eat and now that my milk is in, she's becoming more agreeable and sleeping in longer stretches. Breastfeeding is going MUCH better this go 'round since I know how to work on her latch. Theo is warming up to her, though he won't hold her yet. He calls her "Loo chi" and pats her head very gently. I've been trying to spend as much time with him as I can and he seems like such a big boy to me now!

So, that's the story, as I remember it. Fast and furious but the outcome was good. We are very happy!